I’m so sick of seeing this argument from people:
“Marriage is a failing institution — what are the stats now? Like 51% of first marriages end in divorce?”
Marriage is not a failing institution. People fail their marriages. If people would take the institution of marriage seriously, the stats would be better. But the institution itself is fine. It’s been around for centuries and worked just fine. Because the majority of Americans are too selfish and naive and stupid to treat the institution of marriage so lightly, that is why the stats are poor.
Just like “guns don’t kill people, people kill people”, so too marriage does not fail, people fail their marriages.
The way I see it, people who say that failed marriages mean that “the institution of marriage is a failure” is the same as saying that murders mean that the 2nd Amendment is a failure.
So Sarah Palin’s daughter’s child’s father is a classless attention-whore wanting his 15 minutes of fame. Joy.
Now, I don’t disagree with any of the criticism of Levi by these bloggers at all. The kid is an immature, selfish tool who should man up and start working at becoming a responsible father. But, when I came across this statement, it kind of touched a nerve:
Bristol Palin deserves much better than him.
Umm, on what basis does she deserve better than him?
In the general sense, I completely agree that every woman deserves to be treated wonderfully by their significant other, even if they are being selfish, conniving, lying, backstabbing, cold-hearted witches (not that Bristol is like this, I’m just speaking in the general sense). No matter what, I believe a universal Truth in this world is that men should always treat women with respect and care. But usually when people say “she deserves so much better”, it is when we are talking about a nice, kind, caring woman who is not getting that reciprocated in a relationship.
Now, what do we really even know about Bristol Palin? I think all anyone knows is that she is a teenager who was having pre-marital sex with her boyfriend and ended up getting herself knocked up. Who just happens to be the daughter of a popular conservative politician. And, as it turns out, the teenager she chose for her pre-marital escapades is quite the selfish, insensitive tool.
Taking all that into account, it doesn’t say much for Bristol Palin that she was irresponsible in having pre-marital sex and has bad taste in men to decide to have sex with a selfish, insensitive tool.
Now, if she “deserves better” than Levi, then why was she with Levi in the first place? Apparently she thought he was quite swell; swell enough to have a pre-marital sexual relationship with him and trust him enough that he wouldn’t abandon her after he knocked her up.
Obviously, in hindsight, she was quite wrong and used some bad judgment. This really makes her no different than many young women out there today.
A typical refrain from many young women today is that all guys suck and all men are losers and assholes and stupid and whatever other charming compliments they can come up with for the male species based on their limited experience with them in their lives. You’ll read it on blogs, see it on TV shows and movies, read it in magazines. Women all over the country just getting on their high horse about how their exes are assholes and losers and yadda yadda yadda.
Ironically enough though, while emboldening themselves by tearing down their exes, they somehow don’t stop to realize that the more they explain just what losers were their exes, the more that reflects on them for making such poor dating choices in the first place and having such poor judgment in relationships.
With this Levi-Bristol situation, I just have to laugh while I see some people in blog comments calling Levi ‘white trash’, yet Bristol is somehow angelic and “deserves better”. Why? She’s just another teen girl who was stupid and got herself knocked up and had such poor judgment of which men to date and sleep with, that the one she chose abandoned her. As much of an insensitive, selfish tool is Levi, it also shows what an immature, naive young woman is Bristol.
The irony is that were this situation happening to the daughter of say, Joe Biden, I doubt anyone would be so easy on her. I imagine most of the commentary would be how here’s yet another liberal just sleeping around and having pre-marital sex and she should have known better to be with a guy who was just going to abandon her.
Instead though, Bristol seems to be given a pass, even though she was the one who willingly put herself in this position to begin with.
Now, my rant here will probably be interpreted (if anyone even bothers reading my blog, which, from the stats, doesn’t look like it) as me being a cold-hearted bastard dumping on Bristol Palin. But that’s not really my intention at all. This is really more of me being a cold-hearted bastard ranting about women who bad-mouth their exes, yet claim no responsibility for making poor dating, relationship and sex decisions.
Consider it similar to the reasoning behind Ace’s bashing of Michelle Obama. It’s a rant done as pushback against the women who use their bad experiences with dating men to label all men as loser assholes, yet take no responsibility for their part in the whole choosing to date, continue to date and then sleep with these loser assholes. I really don’t have any disagreement with women when they say that a lot of men are really loser assholes. I just take issue with them taking no responsibility for the consequences of deciding to date, stay with and sometimes sleep with such men. Except in the case of rape, no one forced these women to choose these men. And just as you can judge a man by the company he keeps, you can judge a woman by the men she chooses to date. And if a woman keeps choosing to date asshole men, that says a lot more about her and her lack of good judgment than it does about the male gender.
I went back to Cassy Fiano’s blog to read some of the comments left there and found two good ones. The first one, while I agree with it in theory, I think is a little naive. Teens have been acting stupidly and getting themselves knocked up by the “luuuuuuuv of my life!!!” only to watch their wonderful hot studmuffin boyfriend — who will luuuuv them forever and ever and always!!! — turn tail and run afterwards. But, it’s a nice though. And the second one… damn! Can’t say I disagree, as it’s along the same lines as I was trying to express, only he said it with a lot more strength:
Look on the bright side: Levi Johnson is now, albeit unwittingly, the poster child for why abstinence is a good idea.
Mothers the nation over can point to the Tyra Banks show and say, “Honey, the guy that you think is fun and cool and sexy now may end up doing something like this to you. Wait for sex, because even if you use condoms, you could end up giving birth to the child of a guy like that.”
Moreover, he’s highlighting the failure of “safe sex:” kids don’t always use it. Even those who, like Bristol and Levi, had comprehensive sex education and know how to use condoms are not consistent in their use. It only takes one time of not using them, of thinking that it’ll be okay this once, to get pregnant. There’s a reason why BC failure rates are reported not just in ideal use, but in typical use.
Now, Levi is not just a no-class jerk, but also an idiot. In this day and age, nothing we say – nothing! – is ever erased or forgotten. Years from now, Tripp will stumble across Levi’s little 15 minutes of fame, and it will ruin any relationship he may have with his father. Just stupid.
Let me get this straight: Bristol is allowed to go on TV and lie, obfuscate and simply never answer some questions, but Levi is a cad for giving an interview, however ineloquently. Yes, he made a mistake for doing this, but why is he classless and Bristol not a whore?
Cad or not, it strikes me that Bristol used Levi to get pregnant and the fool never knew it. He thought they were practicing safe sex and likely made the mistake of believing Bristol when she said “don’t worry, it’s okay.”
(Please note that during her interview, Bristol kept saying that having a child at 17 isn’t romantic [after all] and other things to that effect. It’s extremely obvious to me that she wanted to get pregnant and, falling back to raw evolution, she picked Levi. For a while, she even fooled herself into believing they would have a romantic marriage and all that. Then the bitterness of HIM destroying HER life kicked in. Blame the guy all you want, and this is horribly politically incorrect, but preventing pregnancy is primarily the woman’s responsibility. It’s called basic biology.)