AmeriCAN-DO Attitude

Are you an AmeriCAN or an AmeriCAN'T?

Exclusive: Obama’s Foreign Policy Meeting with Former Secretary of State Condoleeza Rice

White House officials aren’t releasing details of the meeting yet, but I came across a secret transcript of the meeting minutes through Chuck Z:

“Ms. Rice, What do you think we should do about our foreign policy?”

“Hmmm… I’d say you have a choice to make. You can either go fark yourselves, or suck my ass. Either way, you wanted the Job, and put Hillary in charge. Maybe you should stop sending that shriveled skank abroad, stop bowing to every tin-pot dictator, stop giving gifts that you find in the “free with purchase” bin, stop sending back gifts that actually have meaning to the countries that gave them, stop offending countries that have been our staunches allies since the war of 1812 ended, and fix the damn economy. If our economy works, theirs might too.”

“Yes, we know all that. What we want to know is how can we look like we’re not screwing up everything, without actually doing anything? We aren’t looking for substance, just style. That’s how we roll. You have to think back to when you worked under Clinton.”

“Oh, then that’s easy. Every time the President gets caught with his dick in an intern, or in this President’s case, every time he signs legislation or appoints a czar, or any time the veep speaks in public, send a division or two to some nothing country for Peacekeeping.”

“Uh, we can’t do that… we are too busy in Afghanistan and Iraq, trying to quit the wars there.”

“Oh, there’s always Bill’s backup plan of launching hundreds of cruise missiles at empty “Training sites” in foreign countries. Didn’t you all pay any attention to the 8 years he was in office?”

“Uh, no ma’am. We were in High School, and the President was busy organizing communities in Chicago, and the Veep was working on his Pennsylvania accent and plagiarizing speeches.”

“Jesus H. Christ. I’m going home. Maybe Powell can help you. He’s big on quitting when the going gets rough.”

“Yes, we called him. He said something about Kryptonite and hung up.”



October 15, 2010 , 2:13PM - Posted by | Barack Obama

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